Sunday, June 29, 2008

Three theories on bugs

I completed two rides this weekend - about 20mi each. Both have been on the PATH trail from Panola to just past the Davidson-Arabia Mountain Nature Preserve and back. On both rides, I was attacked by grasshoppers and other flying insects when coming back to the Panola trailhead. So here are my three theories on bugs:

1) I do a lot of climbing on the way to Arabia so I travel slower. Perhaps I'm going so slow that I'm not a threat and the bugs are able to pass me on their journey to the bug market/bug mall/bug watering hole (or wherever bugs go during the day). On the way back, I catch a lot of great hills so I'm going faster. Perhaps this annoys the bugs so they fling themselves at me jihad style?

2) Bugs think of me as salt on their margarita rim. I always start pretty early to beat the heat so on the way back it's probably about bug lunch time. Maybe, since I'm sweaty on the way back, they like a lick to go w/ their margarita. It's a stretch, but we can't disprove it.

3) There only seems to be headwind on the way back. On the way there, there are hills, but I'm supercharged and I never seem to notice a wind holding me back. When I'm exhausted, just wanting to fly down hills and I'm on my way back, there always seems to be a headwind. Perhaps on the way there, the bugs are able to maneuver around me with ease. On the way back, the same headwind affects them, so it makes it more difficult to get out of my way when I fly down those glorious hills. Similar to #1, only this theory assumes that the wind is the problem more so than my ability to come off hills like Levi.

Other suggestions are welcomed...


  1. Or the less anthropomorphic answer would be that we, in our advanced and technologically fly (yeah I used a word from the 80s, which practically ruins my point) world, the poor bugs are just doing what they've always done and we're just functioning as human insecticide.

    Wasn't Porsche's logo for a long time Kills Bugs Fast? You should make your logo Kills Bugs Pretty Quickly...