Closing Time?

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end"

-Semisonic

I remember the falling leaves like it was yesterday.  They way they zig-zagged around us and floated to the ground.  It was almost this time of year, you know...  I always get a little nostalgic just thinking about it...memories circle my mind like I circled that mountain.

I've never been at a loss for words - like I am now - I hope this is your beginning but it feels so much like my beginning's end. 

Bye Bye Blogger!

A long time ago, I registered my own domain... http://www.Mind-Over-Miles.com
From here on, that's where you'll find my ramblings.

Even Better....

The guy who made this video is now my best friend....

How Appropriate!

The Cool Stuff Report - Man's Best Friend

In an effort to kick start my blogging habit (for the 10th time...), I'm going to do a weekly "Cool Stuff" Report. This report will come on Thursdays each week and will feature ultra sweet cycling related items (or technology!) that I think are deserving of a nod or public mention. I hope you enjoy my picks for this week - Our theme this week focuses on Man's Best Friend - Fido!


1) Cycle Dog Collars - MSRP $26.99 (price ranges depending on buckle style and size)
http://www.cycledog.com

It's made in the USA (Portland, Oregon), cute as crap and is made from recycled bicycle tubes! This collar has an old school "seat belt" style clasp and an attached "pup top" bottle opener for your adult beverage. Sweet! I've ordered three already although I'm a little worried that even the size small will be a little too large for my 9 and 11 pound weiner dogs. There is no extra small...

2) Snoozer Dog Basket - MSRP $89.99

http://www.snoozer-dog-beds.com
For dogs and pets up to 15 pounds (weiner dog friendly!). This basket comes complete with a rain cover for your little friend's head (in the event you are on a leisurely ride with your small dog in the rain...) and a handy dandy water bottle holder along the side. I have not ordered one of these...




and last but not least...


3) Bikerdog Jogging Attachment - MSRP $70.00
http://www.bikerdog.com
For those who need to walk the dog but can't give up their precious cycling time - the Bikerdog attachment comes with or without a harness so that your best friend can run along side your morning ride with a full harness or by simply attaching the leash to he/her collar. I have not ordered one of these since my less-than-brilliant weiner dogs would undoubtedly dart in front of my bike causing mucho painful road rash.

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Stress, fear, sadness and confusion overwhelm me to the extent that I often cannot remember why I started feeling bad initially. Am I mad because someone upset me or am I upset because I'm mad? Sometimes I remember the details that I bottle inside while other times I'm just overwhelmed, and I cannot pin point the moment when it all began.

If I had a therapist, he would probably tell me that I should just spill it - to let it all pour from my mouth like the water rushing down the sides of the tub when you forget to turn off the faucet. And he would tell me that rushing water is okay - it almost always plays out to a larger body of calm water. But I don't have a therapist. And despite being one of the most loquacious of all humans; the more I think about it, the less I have to say.

One of my closest friends describes this as my intellectual drama. I believe "cliff-hangers" was the exact term. My decision [I get angry even thinking about it] not to talk when all I need to do IS talk. If only it were a decision...a blockage may be a better description. A hindrance, disability, or ineptitude. A flaw in my emotional competence. I appreciate the perception that I have control and can make those kinds of choices. Really, I do. I'm surprised that I seem so black and white...

There are others in my life who understand the need to shut down when all of the outside noises become a little more than you can process. When the pieces become so overwhelming that you can no longer see the puzzle. They get it. They put on their PJs and take a nap. Perhaps I just need a nap.

Will I be okay? Of course I will! Could I use a friend - absolutely! Would I spill my guts about all that's wrong with the world? I doubt it. Not even for a couple of beers. I am a fixer and a giver; I like to enjoy moments of happiness. I do not want to lurk in the shadows and corners. I've not yet mastered the art of rushing water.

Sometimes, all you need is a shoulder to cry on - even when you never tell what causes the tears.

It's hard to talk about things that are foreign to everyone around you. You cannot explain your own fears when you don't understand them yourself. Its hard to speak Japanese to a group of friends who only speak French.

So I ask what's more important when your friend is hurting - the emotion or the circumstances that elicit it's existence? Are you more affected by their wound or the bullet that pierced the skin? I think the emotional reaction is far more important and far more telling...

Your unlikely to extract the bullet, but you can probably bandage the wound.

Pots!

On Tuesday nights, my real husband and I have started taking a pottery class. I figured it would be a good way to do something together that leans towards our interest in art. I am a huge fan of all things artistic but I've never successfully found my artistic side (unless you count my husband) - I don't expect that I'll be a potter of note anytime in the next several decades - but this should prove to be a lot of fun.

Day 1 of our class: I giggled at the gooey feel of the clay beneath my hands - you'd be SHOCKED how much strength it takes to center a piece of clay. Who needs P90X - just wedge and center a 2-4lb ball of clay each day!

We are taking our class at Callanwolde Fine Arts Center in Atlanta. Our instructor is named Jennie and she and her husband are both potters. We are the only "couple" in class and guess who is the only man in class...yep, poor Clint. But as usual, he's a natural. In no time at all as you can see above, he had pulled up his very first pot!

My first attempt at pulling up a pot yielded a not-so-appetizing clay doughnut...

As the night went on I got a little better although not before I had thrown my clay (and I don't mean on the wheel like I was supposed to), shed a few tears and ruined several pounds of clay. Jennie came over to assess my skills and was able to talk me off the ledge by the window and encourage me to try a few variations of the techniques she had taught. It wasn't easy, but in the last few minutes of our two and a half hour class, I finally birthed a bowl that was worthy of making it's way to the firing shelf! I'm not sure it's centered but it should make a perfectly fine paper clip receptacle!

It's Not About the Ride! (or...the best way to spend your day)

Note to my regular readers (ha!) I'm just no good at this whole blogging thing...

As you have undoubtedly noticed, I STILL have not posted the rest of my Tour of California photos. I have a ton - but tagging them all takes forever and the TT photos take a lot of time since the riders on each team all look quite similar. And they should look similar - since they are wearing the exact same outfit and ride the same bikes. Anywho - that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. I will one day post the photos, I promise.

Enough about what I haven't been doing..

What I have been doing, which is arguably more important, is riding my bike. I got into a riding rut for a little while there - the desire never left but the schedule wouldn't allow for anything other than my Sunday ride. This is problematic for a few reasons:

1) I like riding my bike. Being a cyclist would really stink if I didn't, wouldn't it?

2) When I don't ride, I get fat. Being fat stinks.

and most importantly...

3) I miss out on therapy. Riding is my therapy. I learn more about myself on a 3 hour ride than I can possibly explain to my readers (all two of you). If you're a cyclist, you get it. If your not - you should become a cyclist to save me the agony of trying to explain something for which there are no words to describe. And so that you can experience free therapy that is WAY better than the kind you pay for.

I took part in therapy with these folks today. Only because I ride have I been blessed with the opportunity to get to know them. So I guess riding is a blessing in addition to being therapeutic.

We headed out for a 55 miler this morning. By we, I mean myself, the FCA endurance team, Lynn, Barry, William (who is kicking some bicycle butt this year after having a kidney removed!!), Jason, my bicycle husband (not to be confused with my real husband who never updates his blog anymore) and myself. Somehow, I let bike hubby convince me that we needed an extra 15 miles. This means that we agreed to meet at the farm at 7:15 and commute to our 8:00 ride (note: "the farm" is my house. I still haven't figured out why we call it "the farm"). As usual, we were running late so the warm-up/commute/extra mileage over was...um...fast. I like fast - it's another one of those reasons that I like cycling and refuse to buy a motorcycle. Unfortunately, fast requires effort. a lot of effort. Sooooo...by the time my 55 mile ride began, I had already ridden 8.....ahem...."quickly paced" miles.

And I had a mini bagel with two tablespoons of peanut butter for breakfast. Yummy but not smart. I had a banana in my pocket but warm bananas are not so yummy.

The ride itself was great. We took a new route from McDonough through Locust Grove and Jackson. We crossed over Lake Jackson and zig zagged our way back to our starting point.

The not-so-fantastic part was my climbing skills (and the 92 degree temperature w/ killer humidity). I should point out that I don't dislike climbing but it certainly isn't my strength. I guess I could be good at it but I'd have to actually do some interval work which I do dislike! But I digress - the point of my not-so-fantastic climbing rant is that I was never left to climb alone.

The best part of the ride today was the group. They are not just committed to their training but also to their teammates. This is something people don't typically attribute to triathletes. (Note: I am not knocking people who cannot decide on one sport - I'm simply pointing out that they typically don't have teammates to think about as part of their multi-sport habit). While I'm not a teammate in the sense that I wear their jersey at races, I feel like I'm their teammate every time I join them for their rides. Over the course of today's ride, I was checked on, pushed along, pulled to the group, encouraged, given a wheel and waited on more times than I like to admit. I was even offered a ride home. I have tons of respect for anyone who will abandon their training efforts to ensure that their teammate is safe/happy/supported. And for them, it's all about commitment. They are committed to something bigger than showing others how strong they are or how fast they can ride. They train, they teach, they repeat.

After the ride and a few minutes of sucking up the awesome AC at the Trek Store, bike hubby and I headed back. We laughed, cut up and poked fun at each other. We hung out and had an adult beverage (or three) while we watched USA play in the World Cup at my favorite local pizza place.

I can't imagine a better way to spend my day. I am so blessed to be obsessed with the best sport in the world.

Stage 6, Palmdale to Big Bear Lake

I enjoyed a beautiful day in Sunny California today - I'm back in the LA area to see stages 6-8 of the 2010 tour of California. Once again, I watched from the KOM point at Millcreek Summit in the Angeles National Forest. I was surprised at the lack of participation this year! Last year I braved the cold with several inches of snow still on the ground along the side
of the road - this year I joined a small crowd of about 20-30 people who lined the sides of the road along the route. The Angeles National Forest has lost its beauty since last year due to the recent wildfires that charred the natural vegetation but it still has it's vantage points when watching the race!



Here's a view of the action:

An eight man break developed early in the race as the group climbed Millcreek Summit. At the front you can see Andy Schleck and Thomas Rabou.

A two man chase by Darren Lill and Ben Day of VAustralia followed shortly behind the breakaway.

HTC-Columbia led the peloton as they approached the top of Millcreek Summit. As they rolled through, I noticed that Chris Horner was enjoying a conversation with one of his teammates. I couldn't help but remember the photo I took last year as Lance climbed the same peak. If only I could climb while carrying on a conversation...

Being here makes me miss my bike. I'm looking forward to the time trial later today - I can't wait to see Levi pull off a win and take control of this race!

New Year, New Challenges

I have the bicycle blues. I wouldn't say that I don't want to ride - but I can't quite drag my butt outside, either. I think about riding several times each day but I can't get motivated to swing my leg over the top tube and clip my feet into those pedals.

I've blamed it on the weather but it's beginning to warm up, technically - the days are already getting longer. I say I'm not riding b/c it's supposed to rain, because it's too cold, because I need to take the tree down, because I can't hang on to the tail of that ride, because my bike needs some work, because my shoes are too small and my feet hurt, because I need to focus more on my family (my husband, my job, my knitting, my cleaning, getting some sleep...you name it).... but it's all just another excuse.

What happened? Where did my urgency go? I miss my bike but I seem to have the most amazing lack of energy...

I need some motivation.

Happy New Year!!!

Most bloggers post an entry on January 1st to "warm up" for the coming year. For me, I'm a little more literal. I thought when they told me to write a "New Year's" post, they meant that I should write a post in the "New Year". And since it's still the "New Year", I'm not exactly "late" with this post....

I've had writers block - the kind that comes in the form of two jobs, a demanding hobby, a husband, and most notably: children. That being said - I want to reflect on a moment of brilliance. They come rarely and I do like to savor them...

On New Year's Eve I had a spark. I remembered how fortunate I've been for the last decade and how much I have to look forward to over the course of the next. I posted a status update to my facebook page that is a pretty good summary of how fortunate I am; I wish I had hashed it out a little more for some deeper reflection but....baby steps. Unfortunately, FB doesn't allow enough characters for me to credit to all of the individuals who were important to me over the past 10 years. This being said...I figure if you're really that important...you probably like me and therefore will forgive me for having only enough spark to post on FB and not enough to elaborate in a long sappy post on my blog. Anyway...that spark went as quickly as it came but before it completely extinguished, I posted the following status message on my Facebook page:

"The Last Decade: Got married, bought a house, earned a degree, had a brilliant baby girl, divorced a drunk, got a great job, found a great man, earned another degree, married a great man, bought a house with a great man, had a beautiful baby boy, got another great job, earned a third degree, took up the best sport in the world, and learned that life isn't always what you thought it'd be...sometimes it's even better!"

What better way can I say Happy New Year!! Here's to making another decade of memories and remembering to find the silver lining no matter what challenges come my way. Thank you to each of you who have been a part of my life until now (even if you weren't mentioned in my fb post!) and I hold even more gratitude to those who will be from here forward.

With Love,
-C

The day Murphy's Law applied

I have seen some crazy crap on my rides: a dead boar on the side of the road (yep, no joke...), a scooter that we were passing as we rode along Peachtree St. (!!), a gruesome car accident (still dream about that one), bike crashes (I know...BORING!!!), children throwing rocks at us as we pass, and more wildlife than I can remember (turkeys, deer, birds, turtles, frogs, lizards, cats (they're wild too...sometimes), horses, pigs, snakes, etc. etc).

Today I can add two things to my list: three deer attempting to run over a paceline of 8 cyclists (I swear they were aiming for us!) and the collision of three bikes - all of which managed to stay upright. Oh, and I should mention that one of those three cyclists in the collision somehow put his foot through the front wheel of the guy behind him, taking out two of the spokes on his Zipp 404s. After we changed wheels and rode the remaining 20 miles home - we realized that the guy who put his foot through the Zipps - he had two broken spokes on his rear wheel and rode all the way back!!!

What a crazy day man...the fun never stops!!

For all of these things, I am Thankful.

On any given day, it's easy to forget that my beautiful daughter is the result of a marriage to a man I try frequently to forget. I often forget that my husband is the most supportive man I've ever known; I could never be who I am without his support. I have an almost three year old son who smiles more than any child I've ever known and loves his sister so fiercely that he I hear him tell her so at least 5 or 6 times each day. He brings each of us more joy than we've ever known. I am married to a man who is giddy when I'm near and makes me giggle more than anyone I've ever known; I love to giggle and feel happy. My husband is an amazing artist and I am lucky to be exposed to such talent; I could watch for hours on end as he creates beautiful drawings and paintings (each greater than the last). I am fortunate that I have a beautiful home in a friendly neighborhood where my daughter can ride her scooter safely without me having to worry. My parents are still a very big part of my life, along with my sister, my mother and father-in-law and my sister-in-law who is also my friend. I have a family and they love me for who I am - how awesome is that!?

On any given day, it's easy to forget that I have career that brings me a significant amount of joy; despite the stressful moments that I face each day. My boss is approachable and supportive and her boss is understanding and knowledgeable. I am blessed with co-workers who keep me sane, even though many of them may actually be less sane than myself! I am fortunate to work in schools where the teachers I work with love children and come to work because they want to. It's nice to have a job where I know I make a difference each day, even if I don't see that difference in my bank account each month.

On any given day, it's easy to forget that I have two best friends who support me, overlook my idiosyncrasies and insist that they love me - even when I'm not being lovable. One supports my obsession with life while the other supports my obsession with cycling which takes up a whole lot of my life! I am fortunate enough to have forged friendships with people who I suspect I will still talk to on the day that I draw my very last breath. Without them, I'd certainly occupy a lonely and uneventful existence!

On any given day, it's easy to forget that riding my bike is a privilege that isn't afforded to everyone. I am good at riding my bike - more importantly - it makes me feel free and at peace with every pedal stroke.

For all of these things, I am thankful. I pray that each day forward, I will remember to be thankful.

Rain Outs Suck!

Nothing stinks more than looking forward to a ride, driving at break-neck speeds to get there in time and then watching as the rain clouds roll in. Why does it only rain when I have time to ride?

A "Membership Drive" and other random thoughts

What a relaxing weekend! I spent Friday afternoon w/ my husband and my best friend, Saturday I went on a good 50 mile ride in perfect temperatures, followed by a party in the evening to celebrate my best friend's birthday. Today I cleaned house, shopped with the "most boring man" and cooked a delicious seafood paella for dinner. What more could a girl ask for?

Well, how about a buyer for my Jamis? I may have one...but I'm not as happy as I should be. You see, my dh and I have made a financial commitment to get out of debt as quickly as possible. So selling the Jamis makes this easier since I could apply what I make from the sale to what I still owe on my new bike, right? Well....sort of. You see, I don't want to sell the Jamis and I'm not being offered what I decided to ask for it (which I think is a very good price - a steal, as a matter of fact). The bike has sentimental value and although I don't ride it, I don't really want to get rid of it either. I posted it on Craigslist because I feel like it's unfair for me to have it sitting around when selling it would pretty much pay off my Ruby. I gotta keep thinking on this one...maybe I should try ebay?

And while I have your attention, could someone tell me what is the big deal with Vampires? Dh tells me that women love vampires and my recent survey of Borders tells me that he must be right since the teen section (which is geared towards girls b/c boys don't like to read apparently...) AND the romance section AND the sci-fi/fantasy section all seem to be oozing with books about vampires. Not to mention the number of vampire related T.V. shows on lately. I have to admit that I just finished watching season one of True Blood with dh and although I think most of the acting is really bad, I look forward to the next episode. I never realized vampires were such a big thing...?!?!

The birthday party that I attended on Saturday night really got me thinking about my blog's readership. While I was there, a girl named Amy introduced herself to me. When I explained that I was the best friend of the birthday girl, she immediately followed it with "Oh, are you the cyclist with the blog that Heather links to? I read your blog and I really want to become a cyclist". Besides almost peeing on myself because someone I had never previously met admitted to reading to my blog, I got to wondering exactly how many people actually read my blog. I've hinted on more than one occasion that I actually only have two readers but I know for a fact there are at least three...or maybe even four! So I've decided to have a "membership drive" (Hey Roby, get it? LOL!!!). I need for every person who reads my blog to "follow me" or comment to this post so that I get a general count of how many people actually read my blog. If you have a google account and you are logged in, you can click the "follow blog" button you see at the top of my page and I'll be able to easily track my followers. Because some of my readers aren't bloggers (or tweeters, facebook users, myspace aficionado's, or even regular email users), I'll track you guys through your comments. So what's in it for you? Check out all of these great perks:

1) You get a 10% discount on all items purchased at Cristy's bike shop*
2) Free advice
3) Excellent discounts at local restaurants and retailers**
4) The good feeling of knowing that you are amongst a group of people who breathe AND enjoy reading my nonsense.
*Availble for online orders only, excludes the following: bikes, maintenance, sports nutrition, lights, clothing, saddles, water bottles, bike fitting, pedals, shoes, lubricants, tools and all other items.
** Excluding those that maintain reasonable security for their customers who are credit card users


So whose in? :) Seriously.

Love Is So Complicated

My first love was a Jamis Quest. Easily, the Jamis is the most comfortable, dependable, relaxed ride I've ever known. I like that it's there when I need it always feels like "home."




Then came the love affair with the Specialized Ruby Pro. Above all, the Ruby is a hot ride with it's all carbon fiber frame and Dura Ace components. It's fast, sexy and the one I always think about when riding crosses my mind.




Is it possible to love two bikes - each one in it's own way for it's own purpose?

I feel so unfaithful.

Post-ride Nutrition

No hay nada como una cerveza bien fría con un buen amigo después de un viaje de 75 millas!

Lemon Flavored Reflections

When the morning air becomes cooler and morning metro traffic becomes crowded with the sputtering, flashing start and stop of the big yellow school bus, rest assured that not only has school started, but that my life has become a chaotic series of events over which I feel like I have very little control. I do the job that I do because I'm passionate about improving education for children with disabilities, but there are days that the goals I'm trying to achieve become daunting and seemingly unreachable. Today was one of those days. My spirit is broken and instead of relishing the challenge I was given, I requested a meeting with the executive director, unloaded my concerns and ended up using half the box of tissues in his office and likely, all of his confidence in my ability to do my job.

As I drove home from the office 3 hours later than I had planned, I reflected upon the reasons why I became so upset. With each possibility that crossed my mind, I became keenly aware of the similarities between my passion for my job and my passion for cycling. Both activities bring me extensive joy and fatigue and engaging in both activities within the same day requires planning and strong organization. I am motivated by the growth potential I see in myself with regards to both activities, and despite the fact that I'm still working towards becoming "as good" as I want to be, I'm still successful enough at both that my self-confidence improves each time I engage in either activity.

But the problem lies in outpouring of emotion that I feel when I become stagnant and cannot produce the level of change that I equate with success. Today, I was upset that I had experienced only a 1% growth in Least Restrictive Environment (LRE) data at a school where I've worked hard to sustain a steady pace of improvement (despite the 13% growth I've experienced in two weeks at the school to which I'm newly assigned). Yesterday, I became upset that I was unable to sustain the pace needed to participate in one of my favorite training rides. In both activities, I've become stagnant and I feel ill prepared to produce the performance results I desire.

So when life hands you lemons, you make lemonade, right? Wrong. When life hands you lemons, you contemplate what you want to do with the lemons (make lemonade) and then you follow a methodical set of steps (a recipe) that ends with accomplishing your overall goal. As I thought about this saying, I realized that the importance is not the end result, but what you do to get there. Moving LRE is a lofty goal, just like winning bicycle races. If I am to accomplish either, I need to develop short-term goals and realize that performance is not only a measure of accomplishment but of the efficiency and reaction needed to fulfill a specified purpose. I need to go back to basics and make sure I'm using the right ingredients if my goal is to quench my thirst.

Win Susan

Touching and beautiful is the only way I know to describe Elden's words. Just by reading his blog, I feel as though he and his wife are a part of my life. Please keep Fatty and Susan in your prayers. When you aren't praying, please acquaint yourself with an incredibly strong man and gifted writer: http://www.fatcyclist.com

The Injustice of Words

The hardest times for me to write come when I attempt to relay an experience for which I have little prior experience. As an educator, I understand that we link what we learn to what we've previously explored so that our knowledge begins to create a web of experience to define who we become as individuals. Once we are adults, we live our lives under the false pretense that we are knowledgeable and experienced. We forget that there are opportunities for growth in every experience and every event. We also forget the excitement of new experiences and the importance of absorbing the opportunities around us.

I visited "the gaps" today in search of confirmation of my strength as a cyclist. As silly as it sounds, I've always feared the gaps but felt like I would finally prove myself as a cyclist when I could ride them without finding myself in a heap of tears, pushing my bike up the likes of Neels or Hogpen. It's always seemed like a rite of passage - an experience that might seem excruciatingly difficult but would somehow make me "wiser" or "stronger." By my own definition, I proved myself as a cyclist today. I found the strength to ride the gaps and learned that the strength I was looking for was not in my legs buy in my personal desire to improve and succeed.

When I sat down to write this, I wanted to paint beautiful pictures with words so that anyone stumbling across my entry might "see" the beautiful trees that line the mountains or understand the way the millipedes scurry across the pavement. It almost seems as if there aren't words to justify the sensation that accompanies my memory of the beautiful scenery I experienced as I climbed Neels. I don't know how to describe the sensation of flying that I felt on the descent from the top of Woody's gap to the rock pile at the bottom of the mountain. I saw sunflowers and smelled gardenia flowers; I found myself soothed by the sound of cascading water that trickled around me as I pedaled my way to the top of each climb. The images swirl in my mind but the words to describe the feeling of exhilaration I experienced just doesn't exist. I am a richer person, regardless of my ability as a cyclist, because of today's experience.